Why You Can No Longer Afford Happiness

If you think you’ll find happiness by falling in love or making peace with yourself, think again. What is happiness without Drunk Elephant’s bronzing drops?

Alice Tran/Been Beautiful

You may not know why your life sucks, but my Stanley Cup does.

The presence of social media is only ever growing in our lives, teenagers and adults alike. With this comes the presence of influencers who, as in their job title, try to influence the everyday person. However, in recent times, overconsumption has become an increasing concern. A few notable examples would include the rise of “Sephora Kids,” aesthetics, and numerous trends such as “Pack My Stanley.” Viewers and wannabe influencers who indulge this media produced by influencers make these trends what they are by purchasing the centerpiece products: skincare, keychains, clothing, you name it. As time passes, these expenses rack up, and the dopamine rush runs out after a day or so, if it even comes at all. Yet, people continue to buy these new products. Why is this so, and are you one of these people? Let’s look a little closer into the effects of overconsumption and social media, as well as how you can stray from this expensive life and find your own definition of happiness instead of constantly facing FOMO when not scrolling or buying things.

Trends leading to overconsumption and unfortunate ends isn’t a new phenomenon. We can see this occurring throughout history, with fashion being a particular example. Historically, society has been divided into hierarchies, with the rich and famous leading (which we’ll look into deeper later in this article). Those in higher society, particularly royalty, influenced what others in their social class wore and what those in lower classes, like the common working person and servant, desired to wear and possess. Take Marie Antoinette, for example. During her 18-year reign as queen of France, Antoinette also served as a leading fashion icon, popularizing color schemes and various styles. She remains a symbolistic figure to this day, especially in the fashion world, impacting the designs of high-profile designers and haute couture, such as Christian Dior and Vivienne Westwood. Antoinette’s overspending and outlandish habits were also well-known, especially to the commoners of France in her times, much to their dismay. This is reiterated in the article “Marie Antoinette: History’s Controversial Fashion Queen”, with Lauren Nitschke noting, “Marie Antoinette was rumored to have had 300 dresses made for her each year, and she never wore anything twice.” Her extravagant and visible fashion choices came during times of immense financial struggle for the French, who were unable to do so much as afford food. Although her dresses and jewelry costed a hefty sum, it was nowhere near enough to be the root of the French’s near-bankruptcy. Nevertheless, her public overindulgence of expensive fashion contributed to the outrage of the French commoners and led her to her execution. As aforementioned, Antoinette represented the higher class that set the trends; what people wore and what others desired. However, the desire others had eventually fueled their rage, as Antoinette’s efforts looked like an insult—a spit in the face—during financial struggles. Sounds a bit familiar?

Nowadays, our version of higher society comprises of celebrities and influencers. The same concept of over-consumerism applies, only now to a different degree, especially with the rise of FOMO. Time-space compression with the introduction of the internet, particularly social media, increases the degree to which trends and news may spread, along with how far. I can nearly guarantee that everyone currently reading this article has also seen headlines such as “This is the Lipstick [Person’s Name] SWEARS by” and “[Person’s Name] Steps Out Wearing Ballet Flats.” Even if you aren’t intrigued by news such as these, others who are curious or fans of the targeted influencer may be and choose to click and read the article or post. Influencers are influential because others aspire to be like them, whether it be their lifestyle or their general fame. For these reasons, fans who admire them may choose to replicate their actions, and as more people choose to imitate the actions of the influencer and others around them, a trend is born (My fellow Human Geography students may recognize this as hierarchical diffusion). If you once or occasionally saw ballet flats online, I’m sure you really see them now. Now you may feel inclined to partake and purchase the product at hand, and maybe you do. But eventually, a majority of people get sick of seeing and wearing skinny jeans or popcorn tops and they move on to the next trendy item. And chances are so do you. Queue the deja vu. 

If you haven’t figured it out by now, overconsumption and FOMO isn’t good. For the economy maybe, but not your wellbeing. It’s like a drug—people constantly chase after these influencers, blindly purchasing product after product for the chance of happiness. However, like an addict consistently buying cigarettes, the temporary bliss only ends in lost money and the same feeling of dissatisfaction, if not worse, feelings and problems. The dopamine hit from buying a hair tool just because you keep seeing it on TikTok eventually fades away. Unless you bought it because you genuinely needed it, chances are it’ll end up collecting dust in your drawer or at your garage sale. The $90 you used to purchase the product could’ve been saved for something more meaningful or to explore and find activities that make you happy (that is if exploring itself doesn’t already do that), like a trip or a game. The fact is, chances are you will never be able to fully replicate the lifestyle you see from influencers. Even if you do manage to buy all the serums, clothing pieces, and specific types of cars, if you did it because you think you will be happy rather than because you know this lifestyle is one you enjoy, you won’t be.

So, does this mean we should all completely cut social media from our lives? Not quite. As a teen myself, I have seen firsthand how social media can be helpful. I’ve learned of new opportunities, been introduced to communities that share the same interests as me, and much, much more. The internet is a powerful tool with endless opportunities, and it is only continuing to develop. To compensate for how depressing this article has been, I’d like to share with you some tips on how to use social media in a positive manner—maybe even in a way that helps you “find” your happiness.

Don’t make it your whole life—set limits and live in the moment

It can be challenging, especially during the summer. However, the fact is that substantial screen time leads to numerous health complications, physical and mental, and it is important to not spend your days glued to the screen. Trust me, what was there on your phone will still be there when you return. Go on a walk. Eat out with friends and family, with everyone putting their devices aside. Read a book. Life moves so quickly and we only have so much time in it, so make the most of it and do and find all that you can that brings you joy (and the answer isn’t by searching it up and watching videos of possibilities on your phone—it’s by finding and experiencing it).

Surround yourself with positive content

Your environment impacts who you are, for better or for worse. Choose the former. Influencers can also be positive and motivating with good intentions; follow people who promote positive messages and your interests, and unfollow those who don’t. Surrounding and forcing negative energy upon yourself will only bring that, and it isn’t what you should do nor deserve. By following and engaging with positive content, your algorithm will pick it up and push similar things naturally onto your suggested accounts and videos. If you are doing this but your suggestions aren’t changing, try restarting your algorithm in its entirety. This article by BrightCanary details how for Instagram (which links with your Facebook account), TikTok, and YouTube.

If you need help, do not turn to social media for support

If you find yourself struggling, you need to talk to a professional or someone reliable (i.e., a trusted adult, a teacher). Social media can direct you to helpful resources, such as online therapists or hotlines, which you should utilize if you are in distress or have no resources available in your physical environment, but do not rely on a random fellow user on the internet. You never know who is behind a screen or what their intentions are when you rely on them. Remember, if it is an emergency and you or others are at serious risk for harm, call your country’s emergency numbers (i.e., 911, 112).

Using social media positively also means contributing positively

As you face challenges throughout life, you may often hear the motivating phrase, “You are not alone.” This phrase means that there are others around that you can talk to, but it also means that others are facing the same difficulties that you are. If you are contributing negative content to social media, whether it be negative comments or content, you may be making the journey to happiness for another person more difficult. Changing your produced content to be positive may not only help others who are also struggling, but it will also contribute to a better attitude and mood for yourself.

Readers, before you go, I want to say this: do not let my article deter you. Seeing something you like online and wanting to purchase it doesn’t mean you are experiencing what I’ve written this article about—what matters are your intentions. If you want to buy a Stanley Cup, go ahead! (I will personally vouch that I find it useful.) But if you want to buy one to replicate a Pinterest lifestyle, you may want to reconsider. Social media and influencers can strongly influence our lives, but we only see the side people want us to see. Chasing an artificial lifestyle will not bring you content, but rather only contempt. Be your happiness instead of trying to buy it.